Changing Role Of Grandparents In Families Today!
I was getting ready after an hour of the refreshing swimming and got into the conversation with a lady who was probably in her late sixties. She was wearing a sad grey colored suit and was apparently unhappy looking after her granddaughters. She was almost dragging herself to complete the chores.
I could only feel sorry for her. I think she was a lonely widow. But the swimming pool is an area for the encounter of many, the next one was a lady in a happy mustard collared suit and taking a keen interest in her granddaughter. She was enthusiastic and excited to see the progress of her granddaughter. As I got into the conversation with her I was in awe for the strength she has. She had a grandchild who was physically challenged and had lost a 26-year son to cancer. The source of her happiness was clearly the healthy relationship between grandmom and the grandchild as well as rest of the family!
I believe the happiness has a lot to do with the strength of relationships in life. But without deviating much let me come to why the grandparents have changed?
As I meet more and more ladies in sixties, I observe more than often, they think they have fulfilled the responsibilities and it is the time for respite.
I have been trying to analyze the reason for this attitude and trying to get to the depth of the thought process. I think of few of the reasons may be:
An oppressive situation for the ladies/people of this generation of baby boomers( 1946-64).
Firstly the elders in the present generation do not see themselves in the pivotal role played by their mother in laws or mom. She has to tread path defined by the younger generation. This makes her feel that she is oppressed by the generation one senior to them and the other younger to them. This feels like an oppressive situation for the ladies/people of this generation of baby boomers( 1946-64).
Good time avenues
The second issue seems to be her reluctance for the sacrifice which may be needed. They are hardly ready to switch off the TV or be away from the what’s app messages to look after the kid or play with him or maybe read a story for the child. The grandparents are probably incentivized to take any pain for the family. This makes the situation self-sustaining destruction of the family values.
The values held by differences
1. The third reason may be the attitude of the daughter/daughter-in-law. The method of bringing up may not be a common platform. Generally, there will be tension in the family rather than an open healthy discussion.
2. The Gen Y is generally Google dominated whereas the age-old wisdom is probably not heeded. This irritates elderly. I personally believe that one should depend on solid research but sometimes age-old wisdom may be a good idea.
What is the solution? I think a healthy and open discussion to bring the complete family on the same platform may be the solution. But this is easily said than done with so many ego’s clashing.
Well, girls, the healthy and happy environment is essential for your child as well as your life. If nothing works send your child to the daycare center and minimize the exposure to the confrontations and negativity of Aura.
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